A bunch of former trustful, unsuspecting kids shared the most absurd things they believed growing up.
As adorable and cute as they are, you've got to admit children are a rather gullible lot. Those poor tiny humans are so convinced that the adults in their lives are knowledgeable in pretty much every topic under the sun and worthy of blind trust that they'd believe just about any wild story you feed them. Thanks to their young brains being a work in process and imaginations working overtime, parents often get away with a harmless lie or two when it suits or amuses them. And before we go laughing at their innocence, it'd be nice to remember that we too were once trustful, unsuspecting kids who sometimes believed even the most unbelievable cooked-up stories.
One such former kid opened up a vault of such stories recently when they went on Twitter this week to coax fellow netizens into sharing the strangest beliefs they held as children.
I wondered why my parents still objected to this idea after I proved it worked, so I thought they were hiding this secret from me because they were worried I'd grow a massive flock of birds and they'd not be able to tell me what to do.
— _grimm (@ExileGrimm) July 6, 2021
Here are 25 of our favorite stories to come out of this thread:
My dad convinced me that when this came on the TV it meant I needed to literally stand next to the television to make it work again. He let me do that for years until I did it at a friends house. Her parents died laughing at me. pic.twitter.com/NuXjxc4oQI
— Elly (@emceehotdog) July 7, 2021
The worst part is that I love peas to this day. Delicious little lies.
— Erin/Yet another Bunnicula fan account (@perquinx) July 7, 2021
one time I played in the woods and felt something weird on the back of my neck. it was in my hair so I assumed it was a hair seed and showed my dad my cool hair seed.
— khraljevo🌙 (@khraljevo) July 7, 2021
it was a tick. he ripped it out of my skull and I cried because I thought I'd go bald without my hair seed. pic.twitter.com/wz8v7aVpKU
7 year old me thought money laundering was when a criminal literally put blood-soaked money into a washing machine to clean it and distribute to their fellow goons.
— everything's coming up milhannah (@a_newfaceinhell) July 6, 2021
The ridge that goes down the middle of the sack is like a Ziploc
— Tanner (@poultrypico) July 7, 2021
I thought people on this street had nowhere to plug their lights in, so they had to sit in the dark at night. pic.twitter.com/kFCm9mlAqX
— Chris Mildebrandt (@mildebrandt) July 7, 2021
I thought that the moon was the sun’s kid and if it was up during the day, that was the moon throwing a temper tantrum and refusing to go to bed
— Nora the chaotic (@nora_chaotic) July 6, 2021
When I was 5 my mom got an elf on the shelf and told me it was watching to see if I was bad. I was so scared I decided to kill it and I snuck out, stole the elf on the shelf, and then ripped it's arms up and hid it in the grass under my window. Then lied about it when questioned.
— amelia (@AmyE57217535) July 7, 2021
When I was 7 and got my first kitten my dad told me you couldn't pet a cat while they were eating or it'd make them sick. He told me this bc I was so excited about my new kitten and my dad wanted to get me to just give him 5 mins peace. I believed it until I was like 18 though. pic.twitter.com/UUvay5W7mC
— Jenna (@jenna_niccole) July 7, 2021
I used to think that the younger versions of a character (like in a flashback scene) was actually the same actor filmed many years prior and they just waited to film the rest of the movie years later
— Adrienne Crista (@adriennecrista) July 7, 2021
I am at a loss as to what I should do with this information.
— 🍥 (@ArbalistDev) July 7, 2021
Any suggestions? lmao
When I was four years old, my dad told me the same thing. Only he added in a gratuitous, frantic ride to the hospital because if surgeons didn't cut the seeds out of me they'd swell up and I'd die. He drove right up the ER door, then drove away, laughing hysterically. Not great.
— Free 🇵🇸 (@ScandiBound) July 6, 2021
When I was younger, can't remember the exact age, I knew tv was scripted and they had actors, but I thought all deaths were real and people were just really committed to the craft, and any "reappearance" they had was just someone that looked really close to the original 😂
— plague doctor on the weekends (@cactuspulp) July 7, 2021
get frustrated or angry at it when it lagged/malfunctioned, I'd just talk to it, like- try to "calm it down" and "convince it to work" my aunt told me she saw tiny me petting her old PC once cuz my sims game was lagging 💀
— helena⁷𖧵🏳️🌈 (@4RThelena) July 7, 2021
anyways, humans will really bond with anything (2/2)
lil me after the PC starts working properly again: pic.twitter.com/xZ6IWT966l
— helena⁷𖧵🏳️🌈 (@4RThelena) July 7, 2021
Until I was about 5 I thought if your parents wanted a boy they cut your hair short and if they wanted a girl they left it long. I thought I was actually a boy but my parents wanted me to be a girl and I used to cry and beg for a haircut. Kinda explains me being NB.
— coffee creature (@ThatTentayena) July 7, 2021
My dad told me the same thing and then he kept going to hit it and I would scream and cry and then he finally hit it and nothing happened-
— Sealpai🏳️🌈 (@sealpai_) July 7, 2021
I live in Poland, and when I started learning English, i didn’t assume it was a language learned in most parts of the world, but rather that while in Poland we learned English, in England everyone learned Polish, and that all countries in the world were put into such pairs
— Kyu (@Kyubayas) July 6, 2021
I found this to be common among ppl my age as I grew up but I thought that human history had a black and white period, and a full color period
— sober driving enthusiast 6’3” IQ 74 (@otltrnehleein) July 6, 2021
when i was a kid i thought marmalade came from wasps
— CJ 🇨🇮 (@CJxCathail) July 7, 2021
because everyone knew bees made honey but nobody explained to me where marmalade came from so i assumed wasps had to do something useful ???
SAME HERE!
— NeeSee 🌸🐙 BlackLivesMatter (@JapaNeeSee) July 7, 2021
I also thought the morning was like a mystical dimension that I didn't have access to because I always woke up late and everyone was already up. One time I woke up at like 5 AM and nobody was in the living room and I thought I had been transported somewhere
my mom told me that when the ice cream truck was playing music they were out of ice cream and i believed her, like an idiot
— tea ☕️ (@ahumblebunnie) July 6, 2021
I also thought something like this. One day my dad brought my siblings and me outside to play and my brother wanted to race him. So they did and my dad took tf off. Completely dusted my brother lmao. I was like what in the hell??? pic.twitter.com/A2BYTTFXUT
— pearlina 🤍 (@Prettyresilient) July 7, 2021
I'm a quad amputee, and a lady once told me if I believed in Jesus hard enough, he would grow my hands and feet back. I was like, 26 when that happened. Not that I believed her. Lol.
— Kenny Dan (@kendra_creek) July 7, 2021
I knew the santa that would visit us every christmas was my grandpa since I could recognize his eyes and smell. But I thought I was the ONLY one who knew, and that it was like his secret identity, like a super hero. His secret was safe. I would've died with his secret.
— Hidden Cat (@wellhiddencat) July 7, 2021
hear the initial address, which seemed rude. After much thought I settled on the formulation "Sorry am I, dear God, that..."
— MD Kerr (@m_d_kerr) July 7, 2021
I was 6.