20 men list common insecurities of women that don’t really matter and it's an eye-opener

There’s immense pressure on everyone to look "perfect," feel perfect, and live perfect lives. Society and pop culture often make us feel less confident when we compare ourselves to unrealistic beauty standards. But the truth is, we are all different, and constantly doubting our appearance is unhealthy. Women, in particular, face more pressure to live up to impossible beauty ideals, and pop culture often caters to male expectations. While many of us are aware of this, undoing years of conditioning isn’t easy.

Instead of conforming to narrow beauty standards, we should celebrate people’s individuality and uniqueness. A Reddit post recently asked, “What’s something girls shouldn’t be insecure about?” Men chimed in, sharing what they find attractive—even though pop culture might say otherwise. Here are some of the top responses encouraging women to embrace their unique qualities and so-called "imperfections":

1. Periods are normal

Ovulation/periods. It’s completely natural, and only weirdos and teen boys get grossed out by you talking about it. u/Representative-Fig96

2. Don't care about beauty trends

A lot of those beauty trends. Thigh gaps, that weird bikini gap thing, stretch marks, etc, I genuinely don't care. Also apparently some are self-conscious about freckles, I think they look stunning. u/SecretSummermidnight

3. Freckles are gorgeous

I personally want to find the person who told women freckles should be covered up and… I don’t want to hurt anyone so I’ll just have a strongly worded conversation with them. Maybe it’s just me, but I have a serious weakness for freckles. From a dusting across the bridge of a woman’s nose to head-to-toe ginger freckles. I think they’re gorgeous. u/Sloowhand

4. Rock your frizzy hair

Frizzy hair! It’s really fun to look at. Some women seem to try to straighten/curl but I think going with what your hair wants is best. Does your hair refuse to be anything other than an afro? Rock it, sister! I know there are always those shampoo commercials with impossibly silky hair, and that looks nice, but there are so many different ways to have beautiful hair. I think genuine hair is often beautiful hair! u/MQ116

5. Stretch marks

Cellulite, stretch marks, self-harm scars, anything that might be seen as a “blemish”. My girlfriend has all of the above and I never noticed any of it until she said something about them. u/CilliamBlinton. I have a huge scar on my chest from several open-heart surgeries. Sometimes it bothers me but my husband thinks it’s cool. u/TheRavengirl13 

6. Breast size doesn't matter

Breast size. A good portion of us doesn't give a shit about that. u/TheBigPasta.

Small breasts, contrary to what most would have you girls think, there are plenty of guys out there that love, if not even prefer, smaller breasts over larger breasts. u/Frankieo1920

7. Belly bump is normal

That little belly bump seriously doesn’t make you look fat it makes you look human. u/Buffkirby

8.  Grey hair is fire

Grey hair on a woman is kinda hot. u/Reddit

9. Nerd is sexy

Brains. Being nerd. For me, nerd is the new sexy. u/Reddit

10. Weight gain

I asked my husband this question, so here's his answer:

Weight gain. Not seriously obese or lack of caring for your health, but don't worry about a little extra fluff. So go ahead, eat that pizza slice(s) you're secretly eyeing! This one is a big one for me because I gained weight due to birth control and a couple of years of poor eating when we went through money struggles. Now we're having our second and final child, so I've been extra insecure with all these body changes and gaining weight. Of course, he's on board with me wanting to lose weight and get back to where I was, but he always tells me I'm beautiful and he loves every bit of me. He has never made me feel bad for my body. u/magicrowantree

11. Wear the same dress 

Wearing the same dress again. Nobody cares except other insecure women. u/rubenespanyol

12. Wrinkles

Wrinkles. Every wrinkle is a scar of a thousand smiles. u/chucklesbtoken

13. Being real 

I like girls who can be real around me. When they feel comfortable and say whatever dumb shit is on their mind, I feel like I’m actually connecting with someone. Cliche, but I think being yourself and losing the insecurity, in general, is the most attractive thing someone can do. u/jrugz320

14. Long eyelashes

Lack of long eyelashes. Literally, no dude ever has cared about eyelashes. u/Frankwhite97

15. Anything genital-related

Not a man, but a lesbian, so I think I can provide some input here. Anything genital-related - pubic hair grooming standards, labia size, shape, color, etc. Everyone is a little different, and I, nor any woman I've ever slept with, or any man in any of the guy talk I've been privy to as a lesbian (always a little weird to be a part of), has ever cared about any of it. Whatever you were born with is completely natural and beautiful. And if you want to rock a full bush, or go completely bald, or do a landing strip, or whatever your little heart desires, you do you, and anyone in a position to see it is just going to be glad they're in that position. u/sabrinavt

16. Good sex is all about connection

Being bad at sex. If a guy says you’re bad at sex, he’s a piece of sh*t. Real good sex comes from an emotional connection. It’s not you, it’s them. They suck. u/Master-frosting-201

17. Going childless

Not wanting to be a mom. u/Zealousideal-Way3105

18. Make the first move

Being afraid to make the first move. I can't tell you how fantastically guys would respond if women just dropped this "men have to make the first move" mentality. If they just walked over and said "hey, you're cute and I like your personality, wanna go out sometime?" Men would go nuts. A lot of women, not all, act like this is an insane idea, but tbh it's very refreshing and really attractive quality. u/AustinFest

19. It's a win

Reading these comments as a girl for a confidence boost lol. u/spaceykaciii

20. It's not okay, girls.

Their credit card numbers. It's okay girls, you can tell me. u/Reddit

This article originally appeared on 4.15.22.