There is no rulebook for dating women but these common mistakes can help men gain a fresh perspective while trying to find a suitable partner.
Everyone has their unique experiences trying to put their best foot forward while dating. Men are on the lookout to avoid mistakes and ensure their date goes well and the relationship builds for the better. Lucky for the guys, there are sources that offer help to enhance one's relationship. Reddit user u/Caseated_Omentum shared a post on the r/AskReddit forum calling on men and women to suggest the most common yet easily avoidable mistakes guys make with women. With over 3k upvotes and 2k comments, several users poured in their opinions. Right from emotions, habits, behaviors, surprises and more, men have shared their tricks and tactics to understand how to make the relationship better. Women too, have contributed with their experiences aiming to prepare the future committed men for their unique relationships. Here are the top 10 mistakes to take note of and avoid in your relationship.
Applying your previous relationships to your new relationships. For example, I took it to heart when an ex called me clingy, which led me to try and "play it cool" in relationships after, where big romantic gestures would have been appreciated, that I would have loved to have done, but didn't because I thought it would make me look clingy. u/Major_Employer6315. Guys fail to realize that no two women are the same. I've got an ex that thought I was selfish and a narcissist. On the flipside, yesterday my wife pulled out a text of mine that she'd printed because she appreciated how selfless and caring I was in the message. Same person, same behavior and yet it elicited two very different responses from two different people. u/fatsynthdude
Lack of situational awareness. If you harass me for a date when I'm trying to work it's gonna be a no. if you follow me into the gas station and then camp next to my car so I can't leave - it's gonna be a no. These aggressive displays of dominance are the biggest turn-off I've ever seen. u/Gossip_Goats. It makes me wonder— if they act that aggressively towards me in public, I’m scared to see how they’d act in private. Red flags all around. u/bigolebeak
Thinking all women are a monolith and not treating them as unique people. u/nekosaigai. Honestly the more I talk to men the more I really start to think maybe I really am just not like the other girls coz none of the generalizations work for me. u/Sade_061102. Any statement beginning with, "Ha, I'll bet you." or "Ha, you probably." or "Ha, lemme guess." Is absolutely. u/Pepurrpots
Sending a d*ck pick. Nobody wants to get a d*ck pic. They want a conversation. u/gunsandgardening. Right! And, besides, does anybody really want the type of person who responds positively to an unsolicited dick pic? Spoiler alert: the answer is no. u/smjaygal. I once had a woman ask me out based largely on the fact that after knowing me for a few weeks I hadn’t sent her a dick pick. I shudder to imagine what brought her to that point. u/Icy_Freedom9677
Taking them for granted, especially if you’ve been in a steady relationship for a long time. u/EaterOfFood. Yeah, this one hits home hard. My first relationship ultimately fell apart because of this. We were together for about 3 years and I didn't fully realize how much of a shit I was until years, years after. I like to think I learned a lot. It can be easy to just get "used to it" but if someone loves you that's a big deal, and you have a huge impact on their life. u/Caeated_Omentum
Paying attention. Listening to their stories and things they like/dislike. A lot of women I know (me included) are detail-oriented, so paying attention to the small things matters. Some men feel that not cheating is enough to be a great partner, not true, that matters but it doesn’t mean you’re the greatest man on earth. We pay attention to your favorite food or snack, or to your life story and ask questions- to get to know you better. It’s like putting pieces to the puzzle together to get to know the other person better. It really makes women feel like you’re listening and you actually care. u/5_8Cali
Being afraid of them. They are just people too. So many guys are afraid to approach women. Being nervous happens to everyone but the fear of rejection stopping you from even interacting with a woman you find attractive will make you miserable. u/JustCallMeRowe. This x100. Treat her like a human being, worthy of your time. If you aren’t a good match, you’ll both know through your interaction. If he doesn’t interact, he’ll have a false illusion of what and who she is. u/Old_Ladies_Die-Hard
Thinking she owes you a sexual favor because you did something positive. u/mezasu123. Daily Show comedian Ronny Cheng has a great bit about this, where he's like, "She is not a vending machine! She does not OWE you anything!" u/PepurrPotts. Now I hope people don't think I think this way. I do positive things yes - I do hope eventually I'll be together with someone I like yes - but you don't owe me sh*t. u/TemporaryBerker
Trying to look like you have plenty of options. Bragging to me about other women being into you is just gross and does not make us magically more attracted to you at all. I don’t want to compete for your attention just like I’m sure you don’t want to worry about all the people I could have either. u/meantamborine. The last man who tried that with me was told "She can have you then". Zero regrets. u/sirensinger17
If you ask how we are doing or what we did today be prepared to listen to the answer and offer thoughtful comments/questions. If he asks how are you doing and then isn't prepared to listen, I'm pretty sure he's not interested so you can just ignore his question. u/RosyClearwater. If he asks how are you doing and then isn't prepared to listen, I'm pretty sure he's not interested so you can just ignore his question. u/ZealousIdealFactor88. Be genuinely interested in the conversation. Ask them about themselves... Don't talk about yourself the whole time. Meaningful conversation is a dialog, not a monolog. u/Lord_Balckthorn